Jax's Artistic Journey...

I've never wanted a year to end quicker than in 2009! I can actually say I LOATHED it for so many reasons. Now that there are only a few days left...I am feeling the tension of not achieving my goal this year. I've always met my publishing goals, no matter what, but this time around I have failed. A part of me is very pissed off I allowed this to happen--however, the other part of me knows I have tried...Perhaps in the scheme of theme I'm just a month or two behind schedule...yet, it's still positive thinking, especially since I have a release come January 10th! HOORAY!!!! All is not lost. I've just got to line up some promo time...ahem, if you'd like me to be a guest on your blog, you know how to reach me. LOL

I don't know about you but I've learned a heckuva lot this year. Most importantly, I learned who my real friends are and how important it is to believe in myself. There are things I'd like to change and there are things that may never change, but I can only try to keep living life and being the best person I can be. I know that we all have our faults but at least I know mine. I have a really good feeling that this coming year will finally get me back on the right path. Honestly, I feel like the Universe has thrown every obstacle at me and I survived it. Woohoo! Maybe I need to make myself a t-shirt or something. Hummmm....I'm still feeling the side effects of the crappy year but I HAVE NOT BEEN BROKEN. My spirit is just as strong as ever, in fact, even more-so. I feel blessed for everything that I have...my family, my friends, my support team. Everywhere I go, I notice that there are so many people who are less fortunate than I am. Even when I feel like I've fallen into the deepest, darkest pit of nothingness--I am still very blessed that I am healthy and alive. I have a roof over my head and I have faith that everything will work out in the end....call me optimistic, but it's true. It will happen.

Here's wishing everyone good health, much happiness, and lots of success in 2010! And if you are one of the lucky ones who have all those things...please give back. Please do one good deed that will cause a chain effect that will touch the lives of everyone who have experienced it.

Now run along...HAVE FUN. BE SAFE. And enjoy the rush that will accompany the ringing in of the New Year!

Every year my youngest sister has a family holiday party at her house. She's one of those Martha Stewart types and lives for any event that require decorations, crafts, and an elaborate Christmas buffet feast. She loves to cook as much as I do and she breaks out the chocolate fondue fountain for these special occasions. I can usually be found around the booze and honey baked ham section to distance myself from the crazed frenzy that comes with a dozen kids racing for the presents underneath the Christmas tree. Next year I'm investing in noise reduction ear muffs.

We always have our dinner a day early on Christmas Eve since our siblings like to travel Christmas Day. Go figure. Well, it works out pretty good because we still have leftovers and those who aren't traveling will be able to spend time together, like going to the movies. Can you say SHERLOCK HOLMES? Oh, right. What was on our menu? It was pretty traditional eats. I must say the fried turkey was AWESOME this year! It was so juicy and well-seasoned that my mouth is still watering just thinking about it. We also had yummy green bean salad, rice pilaf, stuffing, mashed potatoes and gravy, sweet honey rolls, cranberry sauce, sweet golden corn, and for dessert: velvet cake cupcakes. **Groans** I think I gained all my weight back. I can't help it that food is my crack. LOL

Well, every year we also take family pictures. I'm the personal photographer and I get the job of making sure everyone has their portraits done. This year is extra special since my brother-in-law is deploying to Afghanistan for 18 months starting February. There's still a possibility that once he's there, they may extend his stay for another 24 months. We're very proud that he's going to be defending our country but deep inside there are always fears...we'll all be praying for him and hopefully he'll be safe, get his job done, and return home as soon as possible.

Okay, gotta get ready for the active day...

MERRY CHRISTMAS! I'm wishing everyone a happy and safe holiday season. Extra special thanks to all the men and women out there serving our country. We'll be thinking and praying for you!

It's been a tradition for me to watch THE HOLIDAY since it's release and although it's not a classic, or the best romantic comedy I've ever seen, it's always entertaining and has a happy ending that I adore. I like the two storylines but the main reason I love the movie is simply...Jude Law...and of course, the character he plays. C'mon, he's cute as pie and oh-so charming to boot--so how can you not love him? You have to admit the English have a great arsenal of leading men....Hugh Grant, Colin Firth, Ralph & Joseph Fiennes, Clive Owen...I can't have enough of them!

Oh, yeah...this movie always makes me crave spicy tuna rolls so I had to go out and get some yesterday before my movie :) We watched HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THE MORGAN'S? It was more dramedy than comedy. There were a few good one liners from Hugh but the main focus in the movie was about the couple trying to resolve issues in their relationship before they decide to divorce. It was a decent movie but I don't think I'd be able to watch it again like I would THE PROPOSAL.

OMG, I have to tell you--my nieces and I rented the HANGOVER and I wasn't so sure I wanted to watch it. I'm not a fan of gross humor but this movie was so freakin' hilarious I couldn't help laughing non-stop. Now I know why I love Bradley Cooper so much! He plays the best jerk and he's terribly pleasing to the eyes. I was a big fan since Alias and I'm glad to see his career has taken off.

Since I've been home I've spent more time renting movies and catching up on all the old ones I've missed. It's a lot of fun while I'm re-decorating my room and it helps make the time pass. Sometimes it's good to separate yourself from writing because I'm able to see the different character archetypes and story pacing in the movies I've seen. It's a sort of writing exercise and it makes me think. I'm a big fan of romantic comedies because even when my stories are darker, the underlying hero is always very gamma...a mix between alpha and beta. I want these male leads to be strong, funny, sensitive, smart, and chivalrous...they are more real to me than if I were to write a hero who is chauvinistic or a wuss...which often I have a problem with in some of the books I've picked up in the past. I like the bad boys just as much as the next guy, but I'm more apt to go for the guy who makes me laugh and will pull out my chair at dinner or walk me to my door at the end of the night.....

What kind of heroes do you write about?

I've been horrible about posting regularly. I really can't believe Christmas is just around the corner and I still need to send out my holiday cards...will do it first thing tomorrow--check! I know, it's been on my 'to do' list for weeks now but I'm noticing the list has grown longer with each passing day. No way am I feeling sorry for myself. I need to re-organize my life but I know things really won't settle down until 2010. Sigh. It's fine, I'm adapting.

I've been doing a lot of cooking lately. Mostly traditional Vietnamese cuisine and it's been fun. I think my family never realized I knew how to cook. Yes, I'm a bit spoiled in the family because mom always cooked for me. I need to start documenting the recipes because I don't know what I'd do if she wasn't around anymore. I've got a project I'm working on that I hope to give to all my sisters next holiday...well, I've got another writing session planned on Saturday and this time I am going to really kick out some words. I'd say the last few get together meetings have been a little too relaxed so from this point on I'm coming in with a working mindset.

My agent sent me a lovely card and it made me all mushy inside. She is the best!!!! She always know what to say to make me feel better. I gush about her all the time but who doesn't love an agent that really really cares about her authors. That's gold to me! :) Now, if only I can produce more proposals and faster. I have a feeling my work schedule will shift into overdrive next year...I just believe that next year will be MY YEAR! It better not let me down!

I've got darn Christmas Carols running around my head. I need to catch some zzzzzz's--still can't seem to have a regular nights sleep but I'm sure it will happen some day.

I've spent a lot of time away from writing this year. Not intentionally, but because there's been so much happening in my life. I feel like I can't even catch my breath! Now that I'm temporarily settled in the sunshine state, I'll be able to meet up with my writing pals again :)

In fact, I've got a lunch writing date set up tomorrow and then on Saturday, I've got plans to meet a small group for some writing and gossip fun. It's going to be good for me because I've been isolated for so long. I'm looking forward to this and glad that my passion for writing can finally be unleashed. I had periods of total unproductivity but the tides are changing, I can feel the shift, and I'm ready to jump back in the game. I know a lot of my writer pals have been trudging alongside me but I'm proud they've met their deadlines and goals. In fact, several of my friends have recently scored some juicy multi-book contracts--but I can't disclose any of the details (but I'm dying to tell). At least I get to scream with them via the phone or through the email. It's exciting to see their hard work pay off and equally awesome that they shared the news with me while their projects were undergoing negotiations...it's like living vicariously through them!

See that saying "Passion propels your dreams"? I totally agree with that statement. Why? Because when you're a writer you need that fire, that passion to propel you. You need that passion to drive you forward even when the going gets tough. I know I sound like a broken record but once you lose that passion, you lose that confidence and you lose the desire to write. I may go through those writing slumps, however, the passion has never burned out and I'm lucky for it. In fact, my love for the written word grows stronger because of those unforeseen breaks in writing. It's like a prisoner being starved so long that their appetite becomes voracious when they're freed. I love that exhilarating rush, I love the passion that overtakes me when I'm working on my story. I can feel the electricity flowing through my fingertips. Maybe it's a small sprinkle of magic, but it just reiterates my belief that passion does indeed propels your dreams in more ways than one.

Well, I've got a handful of hours left to enjoy my time off...even though technically it's not really time off...but tomorrow I'm back on my writing schedule and then I'll be biting my nails all through the holiday season and new year to see if NY will love my latest project. Hopefully my readers will too if I get a 2010 slot!

Life is whizzing by...in a blurry mess...and I'm completely lost in time. I've been house sitting and my sixteen year old niece is staying with me so I'm having to get up at 6:00 AM to drop her off then shuttle her home at 2:30 PM. I feel like a total soccer mom and a walking zombie because of lack of sleep. I need to write but I haven't had a chance to catch my breath since my arrival. The only good thing about all this is that when I get ready for bed at night, I get to catch up on some delicious reading. It's a wonderful escape and I'm happy to feel any kind of excitement about reading again. I guess as writers we get so wrapped up in the stress and the deadlines that it affects every facet of our daily lives. I've missed reading. I used to devour at least 5 books a week, no kidding and soon it was 1 or 2 books a year. Sadly, I hadn't realized how much I missed out until now. I'm glad that I've made it a habit to read a chapter or two the last few nights. I'm currently reading Lynn Kurland's WHEN I FALL IN LOVE, a historical romance which is outside of my own writing genre. She's one of the few authors I totally adore and will auto-buy. I don't know what it is but her characters are so wholesome and fun. Maybe it's the predictability factor but it's a great comfort for me...much like Jude Deveraux's time travel books, Karen Marie Moning's Highlander series, and Sherrilyn Kenyon's Dark Hunter series...I want to write these kinds of characters that will whisk my readers away and I hope by reading again, I will learn how to really breathe life into my characters...

Here's a good question for you readers....

What are you reading? How does the book make you feel?

Off to bake some sugar cookies. Yep, it's true...I am baking. :)