Say it isn't sooooooo....

Author: Jax Cassidy // Category:
Dear Gerry:

I was distraught by the news today. I'm sorry but I must confide that you no longer appeal to me for obvious reasons. I discovered you have been seeing Jennifer Aniston and the thought of it sickens me. Does that mean they will now call you Gerriston? No matter...

At one time, I placed you on a pedestal and made it a point to watch all your movies. No more. You have destroyed every shred of worship and loyalty I held for you. I even modeled all my heroes after you, but alas, those days are gone. For a man of your obvious good looks, charm, and wit, I am surprised and shocked that--out of any celebrity females in the world--you could fall for...her? The crybaby, co-dependent, uninteresting, John Mayer loving....well, you get the picture.

It saddens me that you are not the man I thought you were...I'm sorry, it just won't work with us anymore. I need to find a man with a deeper sense of value and intelligence (and tighter abs since you've failed to maintain your hot body since 300).

It was good while it lasted...sniff..sniff. I am now going to go unsubscribe to your fan club.

Sincerely,
J.

P.S. I don't love you anymore

6 Responses to "Say it isn't sooooooo...."

Abigail Says :
8:03 PM

LOL! You are too much! I take it you are not a Jennifer Anniston fan?

Jax Cassidy Says :
8:06 PM

Hellz NO!

I cringed and forgave the Gerry & Cameron Diaz pairing but this is ridiculous!

K. Says :
8:20 PM

O.M.G. Say it ain't so! Oh, Gerry, why? WHY? I just wanna hit some sense into you right now. Jennifer Anniston? Gah. I'm going to throw up. Seriously.

Anonymous Says :
10:30 AM

Too funny, Jax! I'm sorry you've had to give Gerry up, but I'm confident you won't be without for long. ;)

Hey, if you're game, I tagged you.

Kelley Nyrae Says :
3:36 PM

ROFL. That was too funny. I didn't know they were dating.

Chudney Thomas Says :
8:18 PM

LoL. Jax I totally agree I'm disappointed in Gerry but I'm hoping this is just a phase.

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