Jax's Artistic Journey...

Simply: I've been taking my muse for granted.

She used to hang around, excitedly filling my head with all kinds of creative ideas, and providing countless sleepless nights. I thought that she would always be a part of my life and never considered a time when she would abandon me...well, that time came a few months ago. I woke up one morning and realized she was nowhere to be seen. For days I worried she had enough of my stubbornness and took a sabbatical. When the days turned into weeks, then months--I knew there was a possibility she would never return. So I begged and pleaded but she refused to acknowledge my existence. What is a girl to do?

I sulked for a while and fell into a wormhole of depression but during that time without my dear muse, I found myself. I wish I could say that I did it all by my lonesome...but the truth is...I had a little help from my friends. What I discovered was that my muse contains elements of each one of my dear friends. While I was in search of one single entity, I hadn't expected that she had been waiting for me to wake up from my dream and see the truth for what it is....

Thank you dear friends for sending my muse back home to me. Without you guys, I would still be lost in that forest, devoid of creativity :) YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE.

And this project will be my love story to you all.

I'm sorely lacking on posts, I know...

I'm still pulling my hair out as I work on my current proposal. Man, I didn't realize I would be dragging so much. I am usually the quickest writer I know but lately it's been a real chore. No, I still love writing...I just need to get to that place where everything clicks and I haven't gotten there yet. Believe me, some days are easier than others but it seems like taking a hiatus from writing really kills your writing chi.

I will say that this time of year is my favorite. I've been bundled up in my comfy PJs and monkey sox slippers and sipping on either coffee or hot tea with honey. It makes me feel oh-so happy. Silly--but the little things really make everything better. I'm currently stuck on the over editing portion of my writing. I've freakin' re-written my first chapter 5 times now. I'm officially done....psychologically I'm going to assume I'm avoiding the moving forward part. Maybe I'm afraid of getting rejections, maybe I'm afraid there are hundreds of other authors who will fit their 'trend' and I'll be waiting forever for a response. Even though I know it's a kickass idea, I totally must learn to focus on me. Don't know why I'm getting insecure because I'm normally the type that hits 'send' and move on. Gosh, I'm growing soft. However, I swore I'd start changing things after I lost that bet to Mr. Right. :( But I couldn't help being sick for a week....right, no more excuses. Double or nothing, that's what I told him...

No more time-wasting...got to go hide in the writing cave. Without distractions I may just make it by the end of the month!

It's funny how easy it is to lose momentum and then...motivation. I had to laugh at the text on the picture I posted.

I'm not a lazy person, honest! And I definitely care or else I wouldn't choose writing as a career. I guess I'm the type of person who wants to do too many things at once...which is the curse of an artist. I am currently trudging through this paranormal and as much as I love love it, I'm letting a lot of my fears and anxieties get to me. The market is tough right now and unless you've established yourself pre-economy dump, then you've got more to prove to the editors if you want a slot for 2010 and beyond. I've got a paranormal circulating and it's gotten a handful of rejections so far because it's not vampires or werewolves. It's too complex, it's not what they're looking for. Well, it makes an author's life difficult when they want you to go outside the box and do a storyline that isn't the typical and when you present it, they don't know what to do with it so they pass. It's about the sure deal, the sure reader pick and if our stories don't fall into what's hot right now...you better hold onto that manuscript for when the trend swings another direction. Why am I rambling about this? Well, I've pretty much forgotten about that paranormal series because I know once I've got a product that will sell, I'll eventually get to pick that Project X back up again.

Right now, I'm putting on my fast draft hat because I've got a bet to win. As I was going through the storyline in my head and fleshing it out even more...I thought I'd start sharing some tips to get a writer going....I think I'm the only one so far in my Los Angeles chapter LARA that has ever finished writing a novel in two weeks so I still hold the record even though I'm no longer with them...that's why I'm going to share my secret with you...

1. Write as if your literary career depends on it. -- Basically, put yourself in a position where you give yourself a deadline. Maybe a month, maybe three but write without re-reading or editing. When you stop for the day, don't look back because tomorrow you're going to keep going from that stopping point. No peeking until you reach 'the end' because once you stop, you might as well forget finishing.
2. Leave out details and subplots. -- The point is that you want to write out the story so you shouldn't dwell too much on the details and subplots. You'll have time to fill in the holes during the editing process. I'm one of those authors who like to over-edit and can't seem to shut off but when I am able to, I've surpassed my writing goals. Your head will naturally write down the most important parts even if you don't realize it. The point is that if you dwell too much on the subplots you'll forget the writing part. It's okay to take notes on your notepad of things that need to change like inconsistency, new h/h names, or general things that must be included but don't let the notes make you lose the momentum.
3. Be realistic, be wise. -- Everyone's got a life whether you're a mother, have a day job, or going to school..but you have to pace yourself. Carve a little time out of each day and make yourself stick to it. Make it your 'career' and you know what office hours you want to keep. Don't make unrealistic goals like you're going to finish in a month when it will take you 6 months to a year to complete due to all those personal and outside obligations. Make wise choices and as much time as you can dedicate to writing is a step forward. Don't be discouraged because even if you write 1-5 pages a day, that's progress.
4. Believe in yourself. -- If you miss a work day or two, it's bound to happen. Don't be so hard on yourself because you can always make up for loss time. The important thing is to have faith in your writing and your abilities. If you don't believe in yourself or your writing, why write? Look, we all have those bad days but by allowing yourself to stay in that mindset isn't going to make you a better writer. It takes plenty of practice, plenty of rejections, and plenty of tough-love ahead to get you to that place you're finally comfortable with. I've written a little more than a handful of books and I still haven't reached that place. I know it takes time and if you really really want to be a writer--YOU HAVE TO WRITE!

Good luck! I'm heading back into the writing cave. Yes...I will stay off social networks for the next week....ok, at least I'll try. :)

I've been consumed with graphics and web stuff. Besides re-designing my website, I just finished up Romance Divas as well. It was loooooong overdue, let me tell you.

But distractions keep coming...my good friend Gemma Halliday just had a bouncing baby boy late last night and I'm excited to be an auntie! I'm also happy to report mother and baby are both doing well :)

Then there's going to be a giveaway at Nikki Duncan's blog on Sunday where Joyfully Reviewed is sponsoring the event. My book THE LOTUS BLOSSOM CHRONICLES is among the ones they're giving out.

On the writing front...I know...I was supposed to start earlier this week but design got in the way. So, I'm starting my schedule Monday--pronto! Looks like I'll be locked up in the writing cave because I have a deal with Mr. Right that I'll be done in 2 weeks. That's including the polish. I work better under deadlines and I will totally be gloating when it comes true--You know it!

Things are looking up now and I'm going to ignore the distractions so it's gonna be a whole lot better. I'm excited about picking up my paranormal because the heroine is SO Kick-A$$ that I wish I was her. The hero is a yummy Japanese science geek which I kind of modeled after Agent Zero (Daniel Henney) in Wolverine. For some reason, I have a good picture of the heroine in my head but no celebrity image comes to mind. She's a sassy Frenchie with lots of sarcasm and fashionable to boot! Okay, as I keep the dialogue going...I will let you all know if this project lands a home in the very near future...which would only mean I will be perpetually under the gun to write. Hummm, not so bad really. But then there's the five other projects I have right behind this one....

Enjoy the changing season...slip on those UGGs! (I know I will...)

Seems like another lifetime where creativity and inspiration just sprung from the ground with every step I took. These days it's as if the focus has shifted and I can't seem to grasp one solid sentence that makes sense. I've turned my attentions to cooking, art, music, and fashion...but deep in the back of my subconscious, there's a voice nagging at me to get anything written. No—it's not writer's block. I've said it often enough I don't believe in it...I think it's a matter of hitting a brick wall and figuring out the best way get plow through it, or jump over the hurdle.

For me, I've got a lot going on inside my head and it seems like it's getting more crowded by the day. Can't seem to shut off the feeling that someone snuffed out this candle of wonderment and enthusiasm. Okay, it's really not that drastic. I'm just trying to figure out who I want to be as a writer. I'm still shaping my career and I believe it's the self-doubt that's killing my writer's buzz. Sounds stupid, but it's one of those things that I need to figure out soon! I mean—I've found my 'voice' as a writer...I just need to convey it in two different languages...one for the mass market and one for me on a personal level. Maybe this new project is tapping into a deeper, darker side that I'm not too sure of. Maybe it's not tapping into the right place at all and it's causing confusion. So instead of feeling sorry for myself, I've stepped back for a few days and let all these ideas simmer. It's harder to prepare a plan of action when I'm the type of person who likes to do three things at once. I know, lack of focus has been my personal weakness for a long time...at least I can admit it.

Okay, so I figured I'll be gone for most of September and wifi will be spotty where I'm going. That's probably why I haven't been too hard on myself about the writing schedule. I know that during my absence I'll have a heck of a lot of writing time. If I can't come out of this with at least 2 proposals and a novella, I'm just in bad shape. As a motivation...and reward, I'll have to do something extraordinarily special—well, at least Mr. Right is going to do something amazing for my birthday when I return from my trip. I think that maybe I will come out of the blahs in time to prove to the publishing industry that it's "game on"!

Life.

Well, I've got soooooo much going on these days and I need to take some time to catch up on all my deadlines and personal obligations. I'm giving myself a few weeks, so in the interest of not going crazy and running down the street hurling profanities at the top of my lungs...I will retreat to the writing cave.

I'll be doing my blogging rounds and trouble shooting issues with Romance Divas, but I shall be scarce. Hopefully I'll be able to pop in and throw out some nuggets of wisdom. In the interim I hope you all buckle down and focus on your projects, loved ones, and staying optimistic.

Reminders:

Every Monday I'm at HOOKED ON ROMANCE and some Thursdays.

The 1st of every month I'm at the Parker Publishing blog.

While I'm hiding out, I am trying to stay offline as much as humanly possible. Let's see how well that works out....eh. If you are desperate for me to resurface, feel free to email me or scream your protests in your comments. Okay, I'm off to total recluse mode.....

Out.

I've been writing and writing and thinking and thinking...plotting and plotting...and my head hurts. I decided to put aside all my proposals to work on a short story. Kind of like a mental exercise to get something finished. It's going to be about 50 pages and if it turns out well, I'll submit it somewhere.

So far the story is starting off lovely. I'm guessing that I could be done in as little as 3-5 days if I keep at it. On the other hand, it could take me 8-10 days if I get distracted, which hopefully that won't happen. I think that I need to write something for me and I'm not going to limit myself in what direction the story goes. I've spent the last few months so wound up about things I can't control so now I'm going to take a deep breath and do something I can control. Hopefully this project will help me remember why I love to write so much.

Sometimes it's easy to get carried away by excitement and passion but every so often you need to re-focus your energies on yourself. I'm going to be hiding in my writing cave for the next few days...maybe when I re-emerge, I will be ready to dive back into the proposal with a fresh outlook and a big smile....