Jax's Artistic Journey...

Don't miss my book signing at:
West Hollywood Book Fair
Sunday, Sept. 30, 2007
10:00 AM to 6:00 PM
West Hollywood Park
647 N. San Vicente Blvd.
Booth 42F

There will be hundreds of great authors present, but my booth will have such wonderful authors like Eden Bradley, Lillian Feisty, Christine London, Will Belegon, and much more!

Hope to see you there!!!

I have been walking around with a 102 fever. No wonder I have been incoherent and rambling...at least it's not Malaria. LOL

My corny new doctor told me I have strep. :( Never had it before and now I'm popping antibiotics and I've gotten sucked into Bravo's TOP CHEF. I love that show. If I could be perfect at anything..it would be in the culinary skills. Frankly, I'm a good chef, but when I see these professionals who create such incredible dishes with such art and technique, I get a lump in my throat. I knew I should have gone to the culinary institute... delirium makes me find solace in food... the story of my life. Eat when you're upset. Eat when you're depressed. Eat when you are sick. I guess there could be worse issues... now, I am going to attempt to rest. I am so not a good sick person. I just want to get up and go. Sigh...

Hope to get well by Sunday for my book signing....

I am going to be doing a signing this Sunday:

West Hollywood Book Fair
Sunday, Sept. 30, 2007
10:00 AM to 6:00 PM
West Hollywood Park
647 N. San Vicente Blvd.

Try to stop by and say "Hello"...

Hope to see you there!

This is my last push.. I am set to jump out of a bloody plane on Saturday, October 20th! I will have a DVD and images of before and after the jump...hopefully I won't be screaming like a girl all the way down.

So, if you haven't donated to my cause...you can still do so...I haven't reached my goal!!!!!

I have a pathetic $285 donation and trying to raise $500 to meet my goal. Where's the love??? Here's your chance to help me help the world, one person at a time...Please spread the word. I'll take anything!

Team Freefall: Skydiving to End World Hunger

Skydiving jump set for October 2007

My team's goal is to raise AT LEAST $5000 to donate to Heifer International. My goal is to raise $500 of that portion. This organization uses the donations for a multitude of projects in nearly every region of the world. Most of these projects deal with donating milking livestock to needy families in third-world countries, who will subsequently donate future calves to other families and build an empowered community. Some involve building bi-national peace parks to educate farmers from both sides on working together towards better agriculture. Others involve educating young girls in Africa about HIV/AIDS.

Here's the link to my donation page if you want to help me with getting people to donate!

For Jax's Donation Page Click HERE

http://www.heifer.org/

How funny that being single can be a blessing and a curse. You either get set up on bad blind dates or you find yourself being hit on by any weirdo with a pulse. Then you've got days when you come home to an empty place and the only socialization is you talking to your money tree about your work day. I normally enjoy the being a slob part without anyone nagging. I also enjoy the 'do whatever I want' attitude. It's a lot of fun to run around in your underwear and bounce on the bed when you're bored.

I am entertaining the thought of a pet but, of course, I can hear my friends screaming "NO!!!!!!!!!" Do I look like I can't handle a pet?? Don't answer that. LOL

I'll say the worst part of being single is the lonely days. Days where you listen to morose music by bitter singers who has been raked through the coals by a bad relationship...you come home to a bottle of wine and no one to tell about your day to. It's a total different ballgame gabbing with your friends on the phone for a few hours, but sometimes you just want the company. I'm not really whining about being single...seriously, I'm just saying that the lonliness never goes away. Or does it?

Please, no more blind dates. I've got a lot to offer and I hope that those considering setting me up should realize I have high standards. A rich man would help my cause at the moment....is that shallow? LOL

I've always loved Anna Nalick's voice. It's soothing and emotional. Her songs are impressionable...memorable. I love all the songs on her 2005 album WRECK OF A DAY because it flows so well with the story I'm currently working on. Falling in love is heartbreaking, sad, empty when you don't know if it's reciprocated...in the case of my character she goes through this mental journey and it strengthens her. I can't seem to get this song out of my head since it's such a huge part of the story....

Forever Love (Digame)
Artist: Anna Nalick

On the ground
With my world
Upside down
I got a vision of your face
And I must get me out
For so many memories we've yet to make
God don't send to me your angels
I just wanna hear you say again

Forever love
Say you'll love
Digame, Digame
Tell me so
I can hold you in my soul
If I go
I'll know

When you smile
With those eyes
Baby it's like
You place a finger on my heart
And your lips next to mine
Makes me think that maybe heavens where you are
God don't send to me your angels
I just wanna hear you say again

Forever love
Say you'll love
Digame, Digame
Tell me so
I can hold you in my soul
And if I go
I'll know

La la la la...

Forever love
Say you'll love
Digame, Digame
Tell me so
I can hold you in my soul
And If I go
I'll know
Forever love
Say you'll love
Digame, Digame
Tell me so
I can hold you in my soul
And if I go
I'll know

What do I do twice to three times a month? I gather my posse and we go write at this cute little cafe called Lulu's Beehive. I stumbled across this place a year ago and couldn't help the energy and charm. There's a cutie named Mike who makes us the best lattes. He's friendly and a great cheerleader for the girls :) My group has grown from two authors to seven and the owners are so nice about us monopolizing the cafe for eight hour stretches so I'm giving a shout out to them...but maybe I should keep it a secret or I'll never have a seat to write again! :)

Enjoy the pics!

I really should be writing....

I should be finishing my deadlines...and I'm working toward it. However, I realized that I have an interest in writing for Harlequin Spice Briefs. The cool thing about it is that it can be 5,000K words. So, I lost focus and a part of me couldn't get this story out of my head so I wrote the first 5 pages. I know, I know. I should be working on my real day job duties but it didn't happen quite that way today. Naughty me! I can say I'm very happy with the results and can't wait to finish the other 15 pages!!! It's a nice exercise to get me back in the groove.. in the meantime, I popped in the new James Blunt CD tonight.. ALL LOST SOULS... It's great! I was going to go to his concert next Tuesday but I'm not ready to purchase $150 floor seats to see the guy. Honey, I love ya, but not that much! I'll have to resort to going to downloading his picture, playing the CD, and probably pretend it's a live concert. LOL

I will have to say one of my favourite songs from BACK TO BEDLAM is called "Tears and Rain"...Actually, I loved all the songs on this CD...and the new one (especially the song 1973)!

"Tears And Rain"

How I wish I could surrender my soul;
Shed the clothes that become my skin;
See the liar that burns within my needing.
How I wish I'd chosen darkness from cold.
How I wish I had screamed out loud,
Instead I've found no meaning.

I guess it's time I run far, far away; find comfort in pain,
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray.
I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble.
It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain.

How I wish I could walk through the doors of my mind;
Hold memory close at hand,
Help me understand the years.
How I wish I could choose between Heaven and Hell.
How I wish I would save my soul.
I'm so cold from fear.

I guess it's time I run far, far away; find comfort in pain,
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
Hides my true shape, like Dorian Gray.
I've heard what they say, but I'm not here for trouble.
Far, far away; find comfort in pain.
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain.

Tears and Rain.

Tears and Rain.

Far, far away; find comfort in pain,
All pleasure's the same: it just keeps me from trouble.
It's more than just words: it's just tears and rain.

Here's the skinny on my disappearing act this week.

I will be coming straight home from work and will be cooped up in my home until I finish my deadline...I won't see the light of day and the two cases of wine will be my only companion. Just me, my CDs and a nice bottle of vin....

Okay--for a bit of fun, so you don't miss me too much, I've loaded up some pics on my MySpace. I've got some great wine country pictures up when I went to Santa Barbara. Hope you like the 200 pics of my documentation!!! I was too lazy to label them and the pics are of the roadtrip, Solvang, the Four Seasons Hotel, the vineyards (Foxen, Babcock, Fess Parker, Firestone, Melville..etc.) Also, I've got my birthday bash snapshots up which I shared with Eden Bradley. My favourites are the food pics!

Back in a week!!!!! :)

I have just sold a single title called ART OF SENSUALITY to Parker Publishing and it's slated for release December 2008! What does this mean? I will not be sleeping any time soon...nothing new. Between deadlines and more deadlines, the future looks....bright?? :) Certainly does.

Okay, I'm not making Nora numbers but at least it's a great prequel to what I hope is a very wonderful future as an author. As I work on my identity, my goals, my personal life...I hope to build a path to where I want my life to be...

Adversity? Pfsst...no prob. I've got it handled. I'll worry about tomorrow--tomorrow.

It's all good.

Turning 36 was a milestone in my life. I've always thought I would be successful at 35, ever since I was a wee lass...and true, success is measured by different things. I can say I did reach the success I wanted. Not the fame and fortune part but everything in my life is coming together. It has been a pivotal journey with lots of twists and turns like my books..but what I've gained is immeasurable.

I have found a strength within myself to keep me motivated, keep me going. Sure I'm not a saint, but I'm taking steps for a better self. I'm learning to empower myself so I can be self-sufficient and mentally sound. Gone are those days when I used others as a crutch when I was down...of course I'm grateful for their support, but I need to focus on the main target. I need to focus on ME!

So on this Thursday, I'm going to start a new path....

It's been 6 years since the fateful day and I can tell you exactly every emotion that hit me that day.

I had been laid up in bed from a major car accident. A driver had hydroplaned from the opposite freeway and managed to hit me head on. It was a day before my birthday and two days before 9/11. Needless to say, my car was totalled when I hit the concrete median. Lucky for both of us, we were spared death.

As I was practically immobile and high on meds, I recall flipping through the channels. The first plane had just hit the Twin Towers and I couldn't figure out whether it was a movie or my brain not registering that it was a news telecast. All I felt at that moment was that I wanted to get the hell out of bed and fly to NYC to help those people. I must have cried all day because I couldn't hardly open my eyes the next morning. I couldn't turn off the tv and watched in horror the replays at least a hundred times. I couldn't stop weeping as I listened to those sad stories relived by those searching for loved ones. Knowing all these innocent people would never have a chance to say goodbye. It still feels like yesterday. It was so vivid and that day I knew my life, my views would change forever.

I still cry for those brave firefighters that risked their lives, those pedestrians who did everything in their power to help a stranger, those brave men and women who spent their last breath showing us that we should find peace....somehow, some way, we did unite as a country and I will always remember the patriotism I felt...still feel. I hope we will achieve that peace and unity....

What I took from that tragedy... LIVE LIFE. LOVE. BELIEVE. MAKE A DIFFERENCE. HELP A PERSON IN NEED. TAKE CHANCES. NEVER FORGET. NEVER GIVE UP.

Lisa and I have made it a tradition to celebrate our birthdays together. Since hers fall on the 7th and mine the 9th, we've decided to have a nice intimate B-day BBQ! It's the first time we've gotten a group of our friends together for a laid back, pool party and lots of alcohol consumption. Considering I'm already on a trend here with binge drinking happening at 5:00 PM last night and the party continues through Sunday. It's going to be so much fun! Of course, I still have deadlines deadlines deadlines but I hope I'll be able to focus on Monday. For now, I'm closed for business.

Have a great weekend!

Go Notre Dame! (Sniff, sniff...it was supposed to be my tix tonight!!!!)

Call me nuts but I'm involved in two very big fundraising efforts in the span of 2 months!

TEAM FREEFALL and SHELTER FROM THE STORM

Team Freefall: Skydiving to End World Hunger

Jump set for October 2007

My team's goal is to raise AT LEAST $5000 to donate to Heifer International. My goal is to raise $500 of that portion or more. This organization uses the donations for a multitude of projects in nearly every region of the world. Most of these projects deal with donating milking livestock to needy families in third-world countries, who will subsequently donate future calves to other families and build an empowered community. Some involve building bi-national peace parks to educate farmers from both sides on working together towards better agriculture. Others involve educating young girls in Africa about HIV/AIDS.

You can donate to my fundraising efforts at DONATION PAGE

Want to know more about Heifer International?

Facts on the Team:

99% of the skydivers are first-timers who will be going tandem with Perris Valley Instructors. It is this cause that is drawing the members to take initiative to finally create that skydiving experience they've always wanted. Frankly, I think they would like to finally feel what an "airgasm" is all about.

I hope you will help me meet my goal so I can jump out of a plane at breakneck speed and scream "Bonsai!"

I'm writing a novella about a jazz singer and it's so wonderful to uncover the music that stirs your soul...I haven't heard Ella Fitzgerald, Sarah Vaughan, Billie Holiday in a while so it's a nice research piece. I am so in love with Ella's smooth voice and her passionate storytelling. I swear all her songs are like poetry. If you read the lyrics they are amazing...

All My Life
Ella Fitzgerald

All my life
I've been waiting for you
My wonderful one
I've begun
Living all my life

All my love
Has been waiting for you
My life is sublime
Now that I'm
Giving all my love

You seem so lovely, so far above me
I'm almost afraid to look
But I adore you, I pledge before you
A heart that's an open book

All my life
Hold me close to your heart
But all else above
Hold my love
Darling, just hold my love

One of the first things I had to memorize in Drama class was poetry and interpretation. We had to recite it to our audience. Although it's a short piece I did get a phenomenal response from it. I recalled choosing this particular piece because it was so passionate, yet and tragic...How can someone love so deeply even knowing that the object of your affections may not feel that way?

I still remember that poem and every now and then it takes me back in time.

How Do I Love Thee?
Poem lyrics of How Do I Love Thee?
by Elizabeth Barrett Browning.

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of every day's
Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love with a passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.